Trent Reznor's return from Self-Destruction
Trent Reznor. Just let the name hang there in your mind for a minute. Got a picture? Good. Now
what does the name mean to you? Nine out of 10 times, you'll probably get images of a dark,
miserable and extremely angry soul ploughing throught personnal anguish and torment, living a life of
tortured genius, full of nightmares and despair.
Funny then, that the man sitting opposite me in the plush surroundings of London's Metropolitan
Hotel semms to be suffeing from something far less serious-the poor guy's gone and got himself a
naty case of the flu. Still, he's in Europe to promote the long-awaited Nine Inch Nails album The
Fragile and he's staying professional til the end. After offering him some advices on how to cure his
ailment (a largish glass of whisky-a natch-with a drowlop of honey , few tablespoons of ginger and a
drop of lemon), we get down to brass tracks. The Fragile is causing an almighty ripple around the
rock music industry- as indeed do most things that involve Time's magazine most influential musician
of the 90's- and the rock press seem generally positive about it. Still, it must have been difficult to
keep perspective on an album that took so long to make, surely?
"Well, the reality of this record was that it was a two-year process by the time I started it, and I
tried to allow myself to really sit down and start creating," explain Reznor. "It wasn't me
overanalyzing or trying to write a certain way; it was mainly me just allowing myself to go with a
flow and see what came out."
"When we started, we just went by what felt right, and I'd say that for the first eight months of the
recording process some of the tracks were really based on a more experimental approach."
Was it difficult to decipher what was good and what was not?
"Yeah, and a lot of the things we'd end up cutting were the things we liked more, generally the
instrumentally weirder things, and i seems as though is wasn't a faire representation of the whole
album when we started cutting those things off. We called in [legendary producer] Bob Ezrin and
we just said to him,'Here's a chunk of 30 songs-tell us what you think, good or bad.'It was a kind of
like a report card grading from a professor,y'know? His comments wew very intelligent and
pertinet, and in the most part were really positive. I mean, it is very difficult to be objective when
you've mixed, and fought with, as well as renamed and just fucked around it yourself."
Does he genuinely worry that his hardcore following is going to like it, or does Trent Reznor not
concern himself with matters like that?
"Well, now that it's out, I'd love for them to like it. I'm trying to do the necessary stuff to promote it
for that reason. I've stayed honest to what I think is right for me now, and I can only hope that fans
can identify it with honesty. There's an emotional there lyrically, and it's expressed in such a sense
that maybe they can relate to it and pick up something that means something to them. That's
probably the main thing I'm concerned about."
And as aside, I ask him how he feels about doing interviews-flu or not flu. It must be a bit a bind to
constantly repeat yourself, particularly when you're considered to be one of the world's biggest rock
stars, and one who seems constant turmoil and self-loathing. The press generally love a famous rock
star in pain.
"I hate it. I hate it because what I've discovered on this wave of doing them is that part of it revolves
around me having to reveal a bit of my life I don't feel comfortable talking about, because it was a
very ugly time, but it's necessary in the explanation of why this album is what it is, and why it turned
out the way it has."
Don't you find it ever so slightly unnerving that people are constantly trying to get into the head of
Trent Reznor? It must be hat to cope with the constant speculation on your mind-state and the
intrusion into your personal life.
"It's depressing. It's not anything I'm proud of, telling people where I am or was. It's necessary, I
know that, but I get tired of playing armchair analyst all day long, and wondering why I feel a certain
way. Fuck it! I don't know-sorry! And I've got them trying to tell my why they think I am, and
sometimes you feel like saying, 'Fuck you! This is my record. I just try to treat the whole situation
with respect, but I will admit it does get annoying. I've come back from a pretty bleak spot where I
don't want to go again, and I've reparired my own self to a degree that I'm a stronger person who
can deal with a lot more than I could at one point. I think I went through a necessary change and
evolution in my own life, nd I think I've achieved something that matters."
The Fragile was summed up by our own Dan Silver, thus: "... one of the releases of the decadde.
But at half the lenght, it could have been the one. "
So what with the double set Trent? Is there a traditional beginning , middle, and end-type
structure? Why are the things the wat they are on there? The record buying public wants some
"From a listener's point of view, the two CDs are broken up in areas where it wasn't logical for a
starting and finishing point. I think it's a linear journey; the first CD makes a lot more sense after you
heard the second one, and the second doesn't sound as important if you don't know the first one.
The first one I feel is a more intimate journey. The second one is a but more esoteric and a bit more
flighty at times. In a sense they complement each other. I don't expect everybody to site down and
listen to both CDs everytime they listen to the record, but I think it works well listening to one and
then the other.
Listening to the album, I'm stuck with the thought you're going to have one helle of a challenge
geting the complexity of the album into a live environment. How are you going to make that
"I'm actually in the process of seeing if I can right now. We're rehearsing and I've got a new
challenge in trying to play live material that's substantially more complex than the past. When we
played the MTV awards I needed two cellist and four backing vocals on the stage, and I don't
know if I want to go that way. I'm trying to find ways to execute them with integrity, but not turn into
a bloated rock band. When was the last time you saw a rock band with backing singers that was
cool? " Fair point.
Time magazine voted Mr. Reznor as the most influential musician of the 90's, a tag which surely
must have embarrassed the man a little bit. After all, he's just mentioned that he's uncomfortable
about interviews, never mind having that label hanging around his neck
"I have a hard time reading interviews I do. Reviews. I'll read. Is it flattering to be called a genius?
Yes. Do I believe it? No. Here's my take on Time magazine thing. It's surprising and flattering, but I
don't take it to heart because who is Time to say who's most influential? Things like being the
number one Billboard album the first week out. Now I meant an waful lot more to me, because it
was people that did matter, namely, the fansm that surprisingly were still out there. Winning a
grammy award in America -or two, I guess- so what? I mean it's nice, it's flattering, but who the
fuck are these Grammy people to pick it? Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining about it but I
think U have a pretty healthy perspective on twhat that really means. It doesn't make me think my
shit doesn't stink and therefore everything I do is great now."
It must also be hard to keep on justifying the pain on your records..
"Yeah, it is. I don't particularly like being a poster boy, feeling the need to constantly talk about it
and then have someone give me their opinion on it. It's like, I'm dealing with it yet I feel like I'm
needing to tell you about it to try and sell this record. In the press, I hear it took me 'five years to
make a record . 'It didn't take me five years to make a record -- it took me three years to avoid
making a record, and two years to sit down and get it done. We tried to make an original sounding
record that's honestm that sounds distressed, that sounds interesting at every level. We really went
to the fucking limit on this one, as far as trying to get the most deep thing we could get across out."
Some people say that your pain and honesty is purely for effect, though.
"I get that more [in England] than I do in America. 'It is just cashing in on a market place?', 'Is it
drama for drama's sake? It's har to be put in a position where I try to say, 'No it's not, that's how I
feel. 'But the reality of the situation is that it's come from a true place of unpleasantness, and it's been
a weight for me to get it out of my system and feel better about myself in the process. I try to turn it
into something that has an element of beauty, and then maybe some other fans or listeners may pick
up on that and relate to it. That to me is the complete circle, and if anyone gets what I'm [going] on
about, then they're getting the same feeling that I had growing up, when there were certain songs
which gave me a sense that, 'Whoah, someone else feels this way, and I get it. 'Even though I
couldn't know what they were really feeling, and maybe they didn't mean what I felt, but it seemed
like they meant it to me. That I think is a pretty unique way to make art: the idea that maybe you've
taken something that could kill you and turned it into something good, in which others can find some
beauty as well. You wouldn't put the album on and say it's a happy record, but it is about trying to
find some sense of reason for where you're at, and that too was a lot more positive than [the
previous NIN album] The Downroad Spiral, which was about getting to the bottom by whatever
means possible. I found that to be a much bleaker album. Not that this is a party album. (laughs)
It's genuinely pleasing to see the guy laugh. After witnessing only the recorded or reported Trent
Reznor before now - where what you get seems fucked-up individual constantly torturing himself-
it's good to see that the guy can be positive as the next man when he allows himself.
"I'd say that I've recently allowed myself to become more positive. The very dangerous
self-destructive side of me I've now learned to keep in check. I've understood what he's about. I
think I crippled him in a way because I know him, his strategies, and I see him creep up every once
in a while now in ways of sabotage, in ways of the "fuck-it" guy, 'Just fuck it! Treat someone this
way or that, just fuck it! 'That guy I've identified with more because he's been around in my life a
lot- not to sound like Mr. Split Personality but there's been a element that I let get out of control for
a while, and I found out he was on his way to killing me. He was leading me down the sometimes
romantic path of self-destruction. I was afraid to work and I didn't have any friends, and it was just-
pleurrrgh! A place that you don't want to be I acknowleged that I just have to be aware of deal
with, my own pain."
There's also a certain amount of catharis for the people who listen to you, surely.
"Onstage, I'd almost have tears in my eyes because I mean what I'm singing so mush, and this hing
hurts. And I'd look back and there's hundred people singing back to me, and they're fucking
teared-up and screaming and the're this weird release. The sacrifices, flaying your soul ever so
often, spreading it out on paper, and then, not only that but explaining in a situation like this why I
did it. Then sometimes defending myself about its honesty because it's easy for someone to dismiss
it sayin, 'He couldn't feel that way!.. well I did, and I had to tell you that I fucking felt this miserable.
The end result for me is a positive one, yeah, and I think for some listeners it is as well. Not for
everybody, I acknowledge that, but for some I think it can be."
As I'm sure most of you are aware, Trent haso kept busy working on other people's projects, most
notably, of course, Marilyn Manson who, it has to be said, went on to pretty big things after a bit of
tweaking from Trent. However, it's pretty much common knowlege now that the pair of them don't
exactly see eye on eye. So does he see the time spent with Marilyn Manson as being time he
wasted in retrospect?
"I've always repect Manson as an artist, and I continue to. I'm very proud if the work that we've
done together and it saddens me that we're not friends now. There has been a personality change in
both of us, and I don't feel particularly good about him as a person anymore. I was at a low point
and I got kicked few times and in places that I didn't feel was necessary within the level of decency,
and I got insulted in ways that made me really question the incredible amout of maliciousness that
went into doing it. A simple, 'Hey everything's going to be OK, 'Yeah, I'm fine'... I don't think that's
right. Someday maybe things will work out, but it's the kind of thing where, when you've really been
offended on several serious leveles.. I don't feel good about it."
You don't seem to get a lot of credit for the work that you did with Manson.
"It's issues of ego. The guy that I was good friends with, I don't think he's around any more. I was
about to start NIN's new record but I wasn't quite ready mentally, so I stopped what I was doing to
work ont their album ['Antichrist Superstar']. And when that was completed, that's when our
friendship went sour, and that's also when I had to deal with some crises in my own life- losing
somebody very close to me- and it all just accumulated into one big pile. It wasn't his fault anymore
that it was anything elseI did give yo some time from NIN to work on his record, but that was my
choice to do that, and it's also a time that I'm very proud of, because I like that record a lot and I'm
very proud that I was involved in it. I think I helped make it a lot better."
Not that he actually needs to worry anyway. Nine Inch Nails are still about as big as any name you
can think of in the world of rock music, and the commotion that the release of 'The Fragile' caused
was a good indication of where the name Trent Reznor stands in the scheme of things. Will Nine
Inch Nails still be around as an entity in another two or three years time, though?
"I think I'm over a necessary hump in my own creative development that I would hope doesn't stall
me out for another several years. I've gained a lot of confidence in the studio and a lot of
self-respect, and I sincerely don't believe that I'm on the verge of another travel down that horrible
road, which would prevent me from doing anything. I feel very optimistic right now."
By Pete Gabler
Transcribed for The NIN Hotline by maelina
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is provided courtesy Keith Duemling and Tracy Thompson from the collection previously
located at SUS.